Z SoccerChic9: May 2007
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
I'm taking over London. Well, at least attempting. You see, yesterday I picked up a map of London from the tourism centre. I have decided that before I leave London (should I leave) I would like to cover every street in London. In order for it to count, I have to either walk, run, bike, or rollerblade each street.

The predictions as to how long it will take me are as follows:

Justin - 1 year and 3 months
Riley - 11 months
Andrea - 1 year and six months

So yes, that's my new goal, I guess we'll see what London has to offer. I'm sure my adventures will produce some interesting stories!


Friday, May 18, 2007
I came home the other day. The sun was shinning, the birds were chirping...I almost expected a rainbow to pop out of the clear sky, and a parade to come down the street. Everything is sunshine and roses, the kind without thorns; or at least I thought.

You see, I have this habit, I get home from work...get out of my car...and go and check my mail box. Most days I'm somewhat disapointed, as it is completely empty, almost as if mocking me. However, on that particular day, I noticed there was mail, and I got a huge grin on my face. I mean, it's this perfect day, I don't have a care in the world...and now I have mail. What more could a girl want.

It was one letter, and as I picked it up, I realized in shock and horror that it had finally happened. There, printed boldly and brazenly across the envelope was the words "STILL SINGLE - WE WANT TO HELP" in bright big type. I realed back in shock, they had found me I realized.

You see, I had let down my guard. A week earlier I had gone to the grocery store, in grubby Saturday clothes, and bought one tub of ice cream, and they knew. They just knew I was single, and so they reported me. And now, the world is trying to fix me, like I have some kind of horrible disease. I may look like I'm okay...but deep down I'm crying...my cover has been blown. I am currently looking for a new residence in a different country. I've also booked plastic surgery.

Labels: ,

Thursday, May 17, 2007
I believe that everything happens for a reason. I may not understand the reason in the moment, or even five years down the road, but I do believe it fits into an ultimate and master plan. That may seem like some giant conspiracy theory, and I suppose in some ways it is. There is an ultimate plan, and there is an ultimate being in control of that plan. Lucky for us...He told us what His plan was, and so we don't have to spend our lives guessing why. Not to say that we always understand the small workings or details...but we can rest assured they fit, they have a purpose.

I suppose I can look at some of the junk I went through, and see it as a trial, something that held me back, or caused me baggage...however, I'm trying to look at it as having a purpose, it seems less depressing that way. You see, if I had to struggle with a negative self-view and all the junk that came with that, just so I could relate to one girl who is struggling with some of the same issues...I think the pain it caused was worth it. If I had to lose people that I loved and trusted the most, so that I can understand what you mean when you tell me you're having a tough time with the ending of a relationship...then the pain was worth it. If I can witness and share my faith to one more person, and really connect and relate because of what I've gone through...the pain hardly seems like pain anymore. It seems like a blessing. Almost like I got lucky, cause God choose me to experience tough stuff, so I could relate to people.

Suddenly, my rough day...doesn't look like a trial...it looks like a blessing. Because when you tell me how you feel completely stressed out...I'll know what you're talking about.

I guess, it comes back to perspective...to seeing the bigger picture, and not getting caught up in the minor details and bumps in the road.

I'm preaching to the choir tonight.

Labels: ,

Thursday, May 10, 2007
If you were to walk up to me and tell me that life is extremely hard, and brutally tough, I would agree. I'll be the first to sing along with Coldplay..."No one said life was going to be easy, but they never said it was going to be this hard." However, the more I travel this pathway we've titled life, the more I realize that my perspective on things can make or break me. I've had to deal with some junk in my life, and really who hasn't, but at the end of the day, if I'm able to look back and be thankful for the things I learned, or how they made me stronger...then I think it was worth it.

There's a verse that says "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

I don't always see the plan, or even understand it...but I'm trusting that there is an ultimate plan, and it's a perfect one. And so, when life throws a curve ball, instead of becoming bitter over the pain of things that have happened to me, I'd rather move forward...cry a little harder, understand pain a little more deeply, laugh more, and live a life that honors God...despite the mess this life presents.

I suggest everyone take a midnight walk in the rain, jump in the puddles, and laugh because you're glad you're alive. It's all about perspective.


Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Do you ever wonder if you did enough? Three people I know died this Monday, all unexpected. One was a man that lives just across the street from my parents, I used to help him and his wife out all the time. The other was a father and son, who got killed in a head on collision. The common thread that they shared, was not only the day they died on, but the fact that they were all not Christians.

It's always moments like that in which you ask yourself, did I do enough. At least, those are the questions I ask myself. I had the same questions cross my mind when my friend committed suicide earlier this year. It makes me wonder if I'm living out my faith passionately enough. If, I'm getting involved in the lives of those around me and making a difference. Or if I've just become comfortable in the here and now, not looking forward or outward, but becoming so focused on myself that I miss the opportunities that are presented to me.

When was the last time you shared your faith with someone? When was the last time you stopped and helped someone around you? When was the last time you accepted someone into your life, even though they annoyed you?


Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Can humans love unconditionally?

Much time has been spent trying to define love. Countless people have attempted to describe what love is into words, and as much as some grand efforts and definitions have been put together, we are still left with the question of...what is love really. I mean, you can have a relationship with someone, think that you are in love with them, then the relationship ends, and you are left to wonder if you truly loved them, or if you imagined yourself to be in love.

I mean, your definition of love is going to be tainted by different experiences in your life, whether that be your view of your parent's relationship, your past relationships, your relationship with various people in your life, etc. So, how can we truly know what love is.

I believe that Christ is the ultimate example of love, and many people would reference Him as that. He lived out an example of love that cannot be surpassed or reached by a human.

However, this brings us back to the question: Can humans love unconditionally?

I am not sure what the answer is to that, although I would tend to side with the fact that they cannot. The closest relationship that I can imagine would show unconditional love, would be that of a parent to their child. Most parents will love their children no matter what they do, there is this bond created that other relationships do not have. Perhaps that is because the parents have created something...and hence have this immediate attachment.

Where as humans who try to create a relationship, I don't think can love unconditionally as relationships are often based on a variety of factors, and if someone were to be brutally honest with themselves, there is a self-serving aspect deep down inside them whether it be large or small.

Perhaps I am completely wrong about this...it wouldn't be the first time :) Maybe one day I will know the answer to this question, but for now...these are my thoughts...just words on a paper.


This template is called "Living the Dream", a modification of "The Light : The Sound". (c) 2005 Daniel Josph Xhan. Use and modify at your own discretion.